A Day I Will Never Forget

Where to even begin? I guess with how I am feeling right now. Tired, somewhat drained, chilly (the windows are open) and thankful.

Today started like any other day, got up and did our routine… Ivan came this morning to hang out while Shawna helped in Chet’s class and Ivan, Jack, Mikie, Mol and I stopped on our way to preschool to get a snack for Mike’s class. We checked out, went to drop Mikie off, then Ivan, Jack, Mol and I took a ride to a dealership with a cool truck on their website for sale. I talked to a salesman for a minute, then we went to a park for a bit for the boys to play and run the bases on a baseball field there. Then we drove up to another dealership and I talked quickly to another salesman on the same type of truck and then we headed to meet Shawna. Jack, Mol and I then went into Subway to get lunch and ran over to pick up Mikie.

As I was pulling out of the preschool I see I had missed a call and had a voicemail. It was my mom and she sounded funny. The kinda sound that you know something is wrong. I called her back right away and that’s when an “ordinary day” gets turned upside down.

Mom proceeds to tell me she called an ambulance… Dad is “acting weird, he’s repeating himself and asking the same questions… he can’t remember if he took a shower this morning or not.” I offered to head right to their house, but knew we’d be in the way. The first responders were there and Dad was being asked all kinds of questions like “do you know when your birthday is?” which he did, and “do you know who the President is?” which he did. I kept it together while talking to mom and told her to call me as soon as possible. I hang up, uncontrollable tears and sobbing takes over. I’m driving and Mikie is asking me “what’s wrong with Papa, Mom?” and I tell him to give me a second. What is WRONG with Papa? The day my dad agrees to go by ambulance – that means there is something TERRIBLY wrong here. “Please Lord, please Lord, PLEASE be with my dad… PLEASE Lord” I’m praying over and over.

We get home and get the Subway lunch out – it all seems like I got the kids situated and fed without even thinking about it. I was shaking like a leaf uncontrollably. Mom had asked me to call Andy and Meg once we knew more but by the time we are eating our lunch, I had already called them both. Meg then fanned it out and called a few people and there I sat, waiting. I called Shawna and started to lose it, asking her to pray. I then sat, waiting. That was it, we were gonna head to the hospital. Right then my mom calls and begins to cry, “Ernie, he’s not remembering things. The same questions the first responders asked him in the house, he didn’t remember when they were loading him in the ambulance.” I cried with her and told her we were on our way.

As we pull outta the driveway onto our gravel road, I think to call “big” Molly to let her know what’s going on. The drive to the hospital after that was, well just a matter of getting there. We whiz into the ER entrance and Kristen is standing there ready to receive. She took the boys in with her and I quickly went to park the truck. On my way to the parking ramp, I pass Mom and our pastor. Mol and I head in and Kristen stayed with the boys in the lobby waiting for Andy. Erk was headed that way too, shortly. Kristen asked if I wanted to go back to see Dad, that she’d stay there with the kids. So I did…

They hit the button to open the door to the ER area and I followed the receptionist down the stark white fluorescent hallway, around the corner to where my dad lay. He lit right up when he saw us, big smile. For a second there was a huge relief, “he’s ok!” I told myself. It wasn’t until we were there a few minutes in the room (with Mom, Pastor Riley and soon Andy) that normal Dad turned into repetitive Dad. His sense of humor there thru and thru but he kept asking the same questions. “How did I get here? Which hospital am I at? Am I wearing any clothes under here?” When he asked the third question the first few times I felt it was just Dad being Dad. But when I realized he really didn’t know he was asking it repeatedly, it hit me. And we were asking him what he remembers. He couldn’t recall the past few days, what they had done, where he had been – they went up north a few days ago and he didn’t remember that. He took the boys to lunch and the park yesterday for a few hours, went to Andy’s last night to pick something up, our aunt and uncle had been there at my folks during the day yesterday… he didn’t recall any of that. And then he’d say again, “I sure hope I’m wearing clothes under here, am I wearing anything?”

After being in there for a bit I had to step out. It’s hard to explain, but I had a hard time (selfish I know) seeing my dad like that. I’ve often said and wondered how people are so patient with loved ones with alheimers. I went to the waiting room where Erk was now with the boys. Erk headed back with the kids to see Papa and I stood in the waiting room. My aunt and uncle, grandparents and Molly arrived and headed back too. I just stood there with Molly trying to take it all in. Then we went back again to his room and he was like, “hey Ernie!” “Hi Dad.” :)

I’m not sure the exacts from there but somewhere in the time today in the ER, I received an amazing gift. This new light on the subject of Dad. You know what? If he wants/needs to ask the same exact question to me 43 times, I will answer it. No different than the first time. If he wants to say the same jokes (we were all in hysterics with his jokes, GOODNESS GRACIOUS), I’ll laugh every time. If he doesn’t remember I was in the room just 3 minutes ago and I have to act as if I just got there? I will. I would walk thru absolute fire for my Dad.

A bit later, Erk took the kids home and I was able to go up to his now “room” (he was admitted) and sit next to his bed and answer some of the questions we had heard all day. The nurse came in and was asking other health questions and some of them I could answer. I felt this amazing peace from sitting there and looking my dad right in the green eyes and trying to help him understand how he gotten there and “did I ride in an ambulance?” “Boy, I don’t remember that at all.”
At that point, with Grandpa and Grandma, Uncle Dick and Aunt Gill leaving too, I’d give Mom and Dad some time to rest. Dad said “maybe I’ll doze off and wake up and this will all be a dream and I’ll be home.”

I was headed to their house to pick up some overnight stuff for Mom and get Chloe to stay here at our house, and told them I’d be back later tonight. Turns out Erk wanted to go back down and see Mom and Dad more and visit, and even though Shawna offered to come sit with the kids sleeping, I opted to stay home.

At this point, the tests that have been run have been negative, but there is some talk of “TIA” or a mini stroke.

It’s been a day that I will never forget. PLEASE PRAY FOR DAD.